The View From A Slightly Twisted Angle

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Kids Quotes #2

on July 21, 2012

As I mentioned last week our daughter Lyndsie is the queen of using the wrong word. One of my all time favorite examples of this comes from a report she did for school in 5th grade. (Yes. I still have the report.)  “Thomas Jefferson’s parents had nine children. Four of them died when they were children. Thomas was one of the five who lived to adultery.”  While that is actually pretty accurate….

Saturday is cleaning day at our house.  I asked Lyndsie to clean the front of the kitchen cabinets.  They are white and show every little thing that drips on them. I said, “See that schmuck? It drives me crazy.” L: “That’s because you have OCD Mom. No one else even sees that.” 10-year-old Jakob: “What is OCD?” Me: “Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.” J: “Oh. Thanks for clearing that up.”  walks away shaking his head.  What? That didn’t explain it?

Same day, me to Jakob, “Dust downstairs please. Make sure you dust everything like the lamps and picture frames.”  J: “How ’bout the couch Mom?”  See? he knows what OCD is.  He just didn’t realize it had a name.

Me: “Please take your laundry upstairs.”  J: “I will.”  Me: “The correct answer is ‘yes mom’ and do it now. Not ‘I will’.”  J: “Warn me before the next quiz.”

The girls were giving Jakob a hard time about something he did that they considered to be “girly.” His retort, “Give me a break. I’m surrounded by two girls all the time.”  Me: “Three girls. I’m a girl you know. ” J: “You aren’t a girl. You’re a mom.”

Lyndsie said something smart-alecy to me (14-year-old girl…go figure) so I shot her “the look”. (you know “the look” if you are a mom. Or….if you have a mom.) L:”Don’t hurt me.” Me: “When was the last time I hurt you?” L: “Physically or emotionally?”  Seriously? Did she just say that? No more Dr. Phil for her.

I was telling my husband the Jack the donkey story with 17-year-old Brittnie in the room.  She had never hear of ditch weed before, so I was explaining it and telling how her grandpa used to cut it all down and then burn it.  She said, “He made a bonfire with it?  I bet that would have made some mighty interesting s’mores.” No visits to grandpa’s farm for her!

Lyndsie was being dramatic. I looked at her and asked “Do you think that’s going to work? How long have you been my kid?” L: “Long enough to know better than answer that question.”

I was feeling a little sore one morning so I commented that I was getting old. J:”You aren’t old Mom. Middle age isn’t until 50.”  I love that he wants me to live to be 100.

We were watching a family movie last night. Lyndsie and I were giving Brittnie a hard time about something. B: “You people aren’t even nice.” My husband looked at her and said, “Hey I didn’t say anything.” B: “No you’re fine Daddy. It’s the woman you married.”

 

 

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2 responses to “Kids Quotes #2

  1. ihcounsel says:

    This is funny! I bet your kids are smart!

    • wedelmom says:

      Thank you. 🙂 They can certainly be first class smart alecs! (I’d like to blame their father….) In all seriousness, yes, they do pretty well.

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