The View From A Slightly Twisted Angle

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What Was That?

on August 8, 2012

All snuggled in and almost asleep the other night my husband, who was watching a little television to relax, hit the mute button and said to me “What was that?”  Groggy, I replied, “What was what?”  “That noise. Do you hear that noise?”  Well I hadn’t before he said something.  Now I thought maybe I could hear something.  Dripping water maybe? As my superhero got up to investigate I argued with myself over whether I should be concerned or just go back to almost sleep.  Then he said, “I think something is under the bathtub.”  What?? Never mind. I was suddenly very awake. “Under the tub?” I said, leaping from bed to stand behind him and listen.   I’m incredibly brave when I have his 6’4″ frame in front of me for protection.  Had he not been home I would have just pulled the covers over my head and prayed the noise went away. Sure enough there was a distinctive scratching noise coming from underneath our bathtub. EW!

Again my superhero sprang into action, grabbing a flashlight and heading downstairs.  I bravely stayed in our bedroom, humming so that I couldn’t hear the scratching that was creeping me out.I heard some banging and contemplated jumping on the bed just in case he scared whatever it was out from underneath the tub and into my room.  You know because there are so many openings to run out of under a tub.  There are no seals or anything.  Besides he could just pop up through the drain pipe right?  No.  I wasn’t rational. Who is at midnight when something is scratching under their bathtub?  My husband returned and informed me that he couldn’t hear anything in the basement ceiling so whatever it was had to be right underneath the tub.  “How in the world did something get under the tub?” I asked him.  He is supposed to know these things. I don’t know why he’s supposed to know but that’s part of his job. Well. According to me.  He didn’t know. He just looked at me and shrugged.  By this time the thing was pretty active and sounded like it was scratching on something metal.  Visions of rats chewing through the drain pipe and poking their rabies-infested  heads up ran through my head. I was getting agitated.  “I’ll check outside and see if I can see something.”  Have I mentioned how much I love this man?  Midnight with a flashlight outside trying to save his wife.   He’s a keeper. Upon return he reported that there were no obvious places he could see and there was really nothing more we could do that night.  He assured me that nothing was chewing through the drain pipe and nothing could get out from under the tub.  Turning up the television to block out the noise we went to sleep. (Exhaustion trumps creepy noises eventually.)

The next day my husband was doing some work in the back yard.  When he came inside he said, “I think I figured out where our visitor came in.”  I followed him outside where he pointed at a long abandoned vent in the back of our house.  I’ve often wondered why it was there. It doesn’t appear to do anything of consequence.  What none of us noticed about the inconsequential vent was that during the spring hail storm its vent cover broke off leaving a gaping hole in the back of our house.  “What is that there for anyway?” I asked.  “No clue.” He said, “but I don’t think it is important.  It’s probably an old blocked off dryer vent. I don’t even think it goes back that far. We’ll cover it again.”  Pondering , I pointed out, “We don’t want to block it off until we know that thing is out of there.”  Dead rodents in my wall appeal to me less than live ones. Besides if we blocked off the escape route where would the scratching marauder go? Shudder.  “Oh yeah. Didn’t think of that.” my superhero said. “Well, we’ll see if whatever it is comes back tonight.  If it doesn’t we’ll block it off.”

That night getting ready for bed I heard the return of scratching.  This time in the wall between the bathroom and the bedroom.  Great.  He moved.  I called my husband into our room.  He listened for a little while and said, “Um. I think that’s a bat.”  EEEEEK!  I’m not a huge fan of any rodent, but one with wings is definitely not on the list of things I want in my house.  We’ve had a few in our garage. One in our storage room once.  It took every ounce of my husband’s persuasive ability to keep me from moving those times.  Now there was one in my wall?!? “I think he probably went up there to roost for the night and now he’s working his way out.”  Sure enough. We listened as the scratching moved along the wall and eventually under the tub.  Then the metal sound.  He was finding whatever crack it was in the old vent that he found and slipped through to get inside in the first place.  He was having trouble.  Scratch…scratch…clink.  Scratch….scratch…clunk.  Just as I was about ready to scream “Find your way out already you creepy little thing!” It stopped.  Was he gone?  We waited another half hour. No more noise.  Superman went out and blocked the hole. My bathroom is once again a place of relaxation and peace.  I hope the bat found a new peaceful home as well.  Ok….I don’t really care if he did as long as he stays out of mine. Meanwhile…..296 days until we move.  I’m checking the next house for unimportant vents.

I’d like to think that our nocturnal friend was this cute…..but I know better.

While working on this post  this song  kept running through my head.  Now you too can have it stuck in your head.


9 responses to “What Was That?

  1. Big Sis says:

    well at least it was in your wall and not hanging from the crown molding in your living room!

  2. Oh…………We had a bat in our house once…within a week we had 3! Not a pleasant time in my life! Had to call in pros to come exterminate them! (They were actually flying around our house!) They said we had a colony forming….ugh…I was a basket case!!

    • wedelmom says:

      That would do it for me – EW! I would have left and told my husband to call me when they were gone. 😉
      I did threaten to call “Billy The Exterminator” but since we haven’t seen or heard any in the house since then I think we’re ok. I’m pretty sure there’s a colony living in the building behind us. We see them flying outside all the time. This guy evidently wanted to check out the ‘suburbs’ or start his own state. Shudder…..

  3. Janelle says:

    We’ve had many unwelcome visitors, but not a bat!

  4. momshieb says:

    Gotta admit, I was creeped out when I read this! So relieved that he got out….I would have stayed awake listening for scratching noises tonight, and worrying about you!

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