The View From A Slightly Twisted Angle

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Here Comes The Curve Ball!

on January 31, 2013

I’m pretty sure by now I have mentioned a few hundred times that I am a woman who likes a plan.  I work at the plan…live the plan…the plan owns me.  As hard as I have tried to become more flexible and “go with the flow-ish” there is a significant part of me that turns to liquid when my plans get messed up.  You may now call me “water woman.” My very observant readers may have notice that the countdown on my sidebar has drastically changed today.  If you didn’t I’m going to guess you have now because you just looked. (That’s what I would have done.) If you have no idea what I’m talking about….hang on.  I’m going to explain the giant-sized, ain’t-no-way-you-saw-that-coming curve ball pitched at me this week, destroying “The Plan” and turning my life on its proverbial ear.  It’s not a bad pitch really.  I just didn’t see it coming.

In order for this to make perfect sense I have to back up a little. I apologize to my followers who have already heard this story. Skim this portion okay?   In October of 2011 my amazing husband took a job in a town located about an hour and a half south of where we currently live.  It was a great opportunity for him and it seemed foolish to pass it up.  Our problem was that our oldest daughter was into her junior year of high school and wasn’t interested (at ALL) in moving.  We conferred,  plotted, prayed and hashed out until we came to the conclusion that he would take the job and the children and I would remain where we are until after our daughter graduates from high school.  His schedule worked out to four days there and then four days home.  He stays with his parents who live near the town where he works on his days “on” and then comes home for his days off. Pretty easy right?  Until you add extra shifts.  And overtime.  And weather.  And the fact that we have been doing this for 15 long months.  I have discovered that I am not wired for single parenting.  (I’m not actually a single parent – he’s always reachable – but it feels like it when he’s gone.)  I have learned a lot about myself, life and what is important over these months.  It hasn’t been all bad.  It’s just been very long. Recently it began to feel longer and longer and….well…..like drudgery.  But we had a plan.  A goal.  I could live with it because there was a plan in place.  I could pep talk myself though it because I knew where we were headed.  Until a few weeks ago.

A few weeks ago my husband received the information about the spring outage at the power plant where he is an operator. Without getting too boring detailed, the outage essentially is a time when they shut things down to fix them. It means my husband works six days a week.  It’s great money but we only see him for that one day and then he goes back.  We survived the four-week outage last fall so I wasn’t concerned about the spring one until I found out it will be eight weeks long this time. Eight weeks of him only being home one day a week.  Oh….and the days will run up until – literally – the day before our daughter’s graduation.  The graduation for which  I am supposed hold an open house and then begin packing the very next day so we can be out of our house in a week and a half.  Suddenly I was not only concerned,  I hit my breaking point.  I can do a lot of things but this all seemed to be too much.  I knew somewhere in my head it wasn’t going to work.  I looked at my husband and said, “I don’t think I can do this any more.”  That’s what the curve ball set itself in motion.  My moment of coming to the end of my rope and realizing that my bloodied hands were about to slip off.  It turns out my husband was losing his grip on his rope also.  So were our kids.  It was most decidedly time to re-evaluate “The Plan.”   So that is what we’ve been doing for the past few weeks: Re-evaluating, exploring options, talking through things.  Without boring you with all the gory details of the very long story of our past few weeks I will tell you that the consensus was that it is just time to move.  The details of how we were going to do that were a little more tricky to plan out.  Seemingly impossible. I was ready to concede back to the original Plan. Then….BAM!  This week things lined up and the curve ball was pitched.

Now instead of moving the end of may we are set to move March 9th.  Our oldest daughter will live with some friends until she graduates.  While that makes my heart hurt I also know she is ready and it is only for 9 weeks. We get her back for the summer before she leaves for college.  We don’t have a house but we are fortunately will be able to stay in my grandparent’s house on my parent’s property until we can find what we want.  I don’t have a job yet but now I will be in the area and I can explore my options more thoroughly without the pressure of having to secure an income so quickly. We’ve been given a gift.  The gift of rest and refreshing and the time to do things the way we’d like to do them.  A few months ago if you would have told any of us that this is the direction we were going to head we would have laughed at you.  It wasn’t in The Plan after all.  Today this just seems like a better plan.  My notice has been given, the younger kids’ schools contacted and things are in motion.  No turning back now.

For the last few days I have gone from being wildly excited to completely overwhelmed depending on the moment.  My head is swimming with the million things that need to be done, both at my job and at our home, before we leave.  My heart is beating a happy tune at the thought of finally – FINALLY – moving back “home.”  My countdown counter went from 122 days to 43 in a matter of moments. My posts may (and probably will) become a bit sporadic in the next few weeks.  If you don’t hear from me fear not.  I am most likely buried in a sea of moving boxes or paperwork or busyness or last minute check-listing. I might be sitting in the middle of my floor crying depending on the day.  I’m going to guess both things will happen in the course of the next month but I’m okay with that.  I’m learning to just work the plan that is in front of me and know that it may change. What I’ve learned this week is this:

Curve balls can mess with your mind and are not easy to hit but if you connect with one chances are high that you’ll knock it out of the park.

photo credit: www.zazzle.com

photo credit: http://www.zazzle.com

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8 responses to “Here Comes The Curve Ball!

  1. Anka says:

    Wow, wow, and triple wow! That’s a lot to take in. Moving under normal circumstances is stressful but there are unusual factors at play here. I give you credit for rolling with the sudden change of plans. Sometimes the best thing to do is NOT look in the rear view mirror. The road up ahead will be full of promise even if you can’t see it so clearly now. 🙂

    • wedelmom says:

      It’s been a wild few weeks. You are so right – we are focused on what lies ahead – even if it scares the beejeebers out of me on some level. It helps to know that this is what we are supposed to do. If it wasn’t there is no way that everything would have fallen into place in the way that it did. Onward! 🙂

  2. Holy Cow! That IS quite a curve ball to be thrown! My washing machine broke on Monday, the day of the week that I do our laundry and they aren’t coming until today to fix it. This little thing has thrown off my whole week…I can’t imagine what upping a move would do to me!! haha!! Well, I wish you the best of luck and that you can get everything pulled together! Thank goodness you started boxing up those cake pans a few weeks ago! Also, good luck to your daughter! A big transition for everyone!

  3. wedelmom says:

    Broken washing machines throw my world into a tailspin too. 😉
    Thank you friend – we’re going to be fine. (Mostly because the cake pans are packed – lol!!)

  4. I’m so excited for you! Your hubby must be glad to have you heading his way!! And God worked it all out for you. AWESOME!!

  5. Valerie says:

    Yes, I noticed your ticker changed (before reading what you said!) and I was like…”Is it already June?” lol Wow, I am so excited for you!! I am a woman who needs a plan too, so I feel your pain/excitement at this turn of events! xx

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